marriage counselling Posts

Marriage Communication – Are You on My Team?

There has been lots of emphasis in my marriage counselling recently on the idea of couples wanting to be on the same team. Establishing the idea of team early in the relationship is very helpful but it can still be hard to sustain the idea of team in relationship over time. Somehow in the stresses and disappointments in a day, it is much easier to separate emotionally and consider that the other has poor intentions towards the relationship. This is a choice you can make in your relationship. By making the choice towards holding the belief that your partner has good intentions, you are part way to the place of understanding and team. When something goes wrong on a hockey team, the team members do not automatically go to bad intentions towards their team mate. The team goes back to the drawing board to work out how to do better as a team the next time. The team mate who made the mistake, practices more and endeavours to change themselves. When you choose to have a mindset that believes in your partners good intentions, you can have a conversation that allows you to look out for the holes in your team and work out how to be a better team the next time. You can brainstorm how to make changes individually and as a team to strengthen the attachment together, and know that it is “you together” against the world. Peace and strength to your house!