New Years couple goals Posts

Facing 2018 Together

At its best, we can use this closing of the year and the beginning of 2018 to see ourselves and our partner with new eyes, and to meet the we-ness that we have travelled the year together with. To face our challenges and regrets together and our joys and gains together with a sense of love and compassion and curiosity in the face of all that did or didn’t transpire in the year 2017. Take some time together to look at the wisdom you gained by living your lives side by side and individually. Honour the sense of growing wiser, learning the lessons of life and relationship and gaining solid new insights as a result of living your lives together. Become more humble as you reflect on the things you believed or bought into that weren’t true, and the pain and rewards of finally letting go of those. Face the regrettable times when you weren’t there and did not show up when love called you to do so for your partner. Bring to your awareness the times you did show up for each other and the deepening of connection that brought to you. Spend time in gratitude for all you have experienced and have in your lives together. Reflect on the potential expansiveness and graciousness that deliberate love has to begin anew in 2018. Reflect on the beauty of the imperfect that represents you and your partner in relationship and what light those imperfections make in a call towards your personal and relationship change in the year 2018.

Who will you be as a couple in 2017?

Many people are considering who they will be in 2017. Many are setting goals that unfortunately, are rarely sustained past January. But there are few people who are making commitments about how they will show up in the world as an example of a couple who loves well and are trying to have a positive influence on their world. There has probably never been a time as important as now where who you are as a couple will make such a difference in your world. When couples show up in their world at their best, it brings such hope to others. When they see a couple who have a secure attachment relationship, others are drawn to that love and support that they sense in that couple. They respond in a biologically positive way. When you are showing up at your best in the relationship where your partner can count on you, it leaves you with emotional energy to give back to the world. That gives you meaning and gives others much needed hope for our world. This circle of positive influence is both wide and ripples outward and narrowed right into your home with your children or other intimates. How would you go about doing this as a couple this season?

1. Sit together and see what values you share. From this place of togetherness,  see where your heart leads you as you put together some possible projects that you would like to contribute together this year. There should be a sense of excitement and energy around these ideas. This might be something that you would like to change in yourself that would benefit the relationship; something that you would like to change in the relationship that would have you showing up more positively in the world; or something that you could contribute as a couple to your community.

2. Have times of reflection and renewal to keep your desires alive together over the next weeks and months. This needs to be built into your calendar together. You will show up together to evaluate how you are doing and to support and encourage each other in your projects together.

Take time to think of the end of your long life and imagine how the decisions to be a great partner and couple in 2017 will make a difference to how you feel you lived your life. Enjoy the process. As usual go forth and be wonderful!